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So, Good News Is I Didn't Pee Myself...

By Anonymous
Seriously, this is exciting news. I have had 3 kids. I have had 3 gigantic kids. Two of those giants were vaginal deliveries. #3 decided to be spontaneous and insist on a C-section. Yeah, that was fun. So, the exciting result of 3 kids that NO ONE EVER TALKS ABOUT?! You pee yourself. It's true. I leaked a little after I had Diva. After twins? I pee myself. What causes it? Laughing, coughing (bronchitis is a death sentence), sneezing, jumping, running, hop scotch, jump rope and any other jarring activity. It's embarrassing. And, before anyone says "Oh, just do kegel's. It will stop that." I've been doing kegel's since 2007. It's not helping. I still pee. 
So, what happened that I didn't pee myself? I would LOVE to tell you. I went to Body Pump before dawn this morning. Half way during class the instructor had us do a move that was terrifying and caused me to panic a little. Well, a lot. A whole lot. She expected the class to jump on and off of our step boards we had been using. Like some sort of jumping jack on crack. OH-EM-GEE....this is going to be bad. I'm NEVER going to be able to show my face at the gym again. I didn't want to seem wussy though and not do, or at least look like I am doing what the rest of the class is. So, I closed my eyes and jumped. Not even a dribble. Wha?! Let me jump again just to make sure. Yup, still nothing. Whoo Hoo!! I was a jumping fool in class this morning. I did all 5 million reps and didn't pee myself once. WINNING!! I didn't even feel like I was going to. I felt a little triumphant this morning. And, I can still show my face at the gym. 
I wanted to find a clever picture to put on this post. However, when you google cartoon character peeing, woman needing to pee, pee, and cartoon pee pictures you get a bunch of porn. I probably have a virus on my computer now. I didn't realize that pee was such a porny thing. But it is. 

Comments

  1. MistiApril 23, 2013 at 5:08 PM

    LOL too freakin funny!

    ReplyDelete
  2. UnknownApril 23, 2013 at 7:02 PM

    Thanks for the Laugh!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Boni LadyApril 24, 2013 at 6:45 AM

    cracking up right now! thanks for that! who knew pee was porn??!! LMBO! glad you made it without peeing :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. The 4-Crows BlogMay 5, 2013 at 3:03 PM

    Really? I am so jealous!!! Praying for that day to finally happen to me. What is that class? Obviously it's building up some pee resistance muscle. It might need to start getting more testimonies, lol!

    ReplyDelete

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